The list for July 24, 2013
NOTE FROM CHRIS:
In England, Prince William and the Duchess of
Cambridge recently welcomed their first child,
George. The baby is resting comfortably and seems
to be happy with its new wealth and social status.
Cambridge recently welcomed their first child,
George. The baby is resting comfortably and seems
to be happy with its new wealth and social status.
The Top 20 Haikus About the New Royal Baby
- Honeymoon’s over:
Tabloids open bidding for
future king nude pix.
- Little royal dude
will be funny looking from
years of inbreeding.
- Bah, diapers again!
When you finish with the prince
Please change the queen’s, too.
- Thank God *that’s* over.
Let’s get back to crucial things,
like Comic-Con, dude!
- Any Governess
will just pale in compare to
smokin’ Aunt Pippa.
- England’s new baby
Perfect, strong and healthy, with
no bad teeth this year.
- The child rules their lives!
A name befitting this prince:
Machiavelli.
- Let us see photos
Of that naked little boy.
The kid —- not Harry!
- Beautiful baby.
Let’s just hope the little guy
doesn’t have Gramp’s ears.
- I don’t give a damn.
Kardashian has one, too.
One more mouth to feed.
- Sounds in the palace
Baby burps and baby farts
New Windsor blowing.
- I bought him a gift:
My Little Polo Pony
from Princes ‘R’ Us.
- Child, very few have
been in the places you’ve been:
Royal vajayjay.
- Milk expressed by Mum
or from a royal wet nurse
is still British food.
- Hail the future king?
Nah, just one more royal male
for Liz to outlive.
- It’s just so darling
when he seizes the blankets
from some peasant kids.
- Good show, Will and Kate!
Babies make better ratings —-
just ask Will and Grace.
- Perhaps he will paint,
not rule, and be the artist
formerly known as…
- My dear little Prince,
your great-grandma is the Queen.
Please don’t pee on her.
And the Number 1 Haiku About the New Royal Baby…
- Vital signs are good!
Your work is done, Middleton.
You are now dismissed.
.
CREDITS
Selected from 70 submissions from 26 contributors.
Today’s list authors were:
- Travis Ruetenik, Hiroshima, Japan — 1 (29th #1)
- Bruce W. Alter, Fairfax Station, VA — 2
- Larry Hollister, Concord, CA — 3, 10
- John J. Brassil, Nashville, TN — 4
- David Kass, Queens, NY — 5
- Mark D. Sabien, What Cheer, IA — 6
- Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA — 7
- Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA — 8, 19
- Tom Stoudt, Fort Washington, PA — 9
- Elliott Schiff, Allentown, PA — 11
- Tristan Fabriani, Passaic, NJ — 12
- Jay Shuck, Minneapolis, MN — 13
- M.J. Finan, Cleveland, OH — 14
- Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL — 15
- Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH — 16
- Adela Branson, Soda Springs, ID — 17, 20
- Art Kinderbuch, Alexandria, VA — 18
- Donald Junter, New Haven, CT — Banner Tag
- Chris White, Olympia, WA — List owner/editor
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